• 2011 (16)
  • 2010 (141)
  • 2009 (12)

Responding to Your Wants Rather Than Reacting

August 12, 2010

Sandra Hendricks, EzineArticles.com Expert AuthorHave you ever had the feeling that you are forcing yourself to be responsible? Do you know that you should do something and perceive that you just don’t feel like doing it? At times like these, it is easy to convince ourselves that we are unmotivated. However, when we feel like doing something we think that we are motivated. If we equate motivation to desire, we can misjudge ourselves. The desire to do something directly relates to what you want or intend to do. If you lack the desire to do something, it is because your concern is on what you want, to avoid. It is difficult to apply ourselves to what we want to avoid. We still have an inner stimulus to succeed, and it has little, to do with our desire.


motivation [noun]
1. the psychological feature that arouses an organism to action toward a desired goal; the reason for the action; that which gives purpose and direction to behavior; “we did not understand his motivation”; “he acted with the best of motives”
2. the condition of being motivated; “his motivation was at a high level”
3. the act of motivating; providing incentive

Above is a simple dictionary meaning of the word motivation. Below you can read the meaning of desire.


desire [noun]
1. the feeling that accompanies an unsatisfied state
2. an inclination to want things; “a man of many desires”
3. something that is desired

desire [verb]
1. feel or have a desire for; want strongly; “I want to go home now”; “I want my own room”
2. expect and wish; “I trust you will behave better from now on”; “I hope she understands that she cannot expect a raise”
3. express a desire for


Even without desire, our mind motivates us to do what we should do if we want to succeed. Many people believe that circumstances motivate them (outer motivation). They may be without a desire to wash their car, if they have the thought that they don’t want it to be filthy. However, they most likely have a desire if they want their car clean. This may seem like splitting hairs and many of you may fail to see the difference. There is a distinction in how you feel when your inner-motivation encourages you toward action. When you conceive you should wash your car, and you have thought positive it is wonderful. If you have thought negative and then think you should wash your car, you get the feeling that you have to force yourself to do what is necessary. It may even seem as if someone is commanding you or reminding you of what you want to avoid.

Our common senses stimulate our inner-motivation. This can leave us with the impression that something outside us motivates. If you have stated that, you don’t want your car filthy, and SEE that it is you then perceive what is necessary. If you want your car to be clean and SEE it is dirty, you also perceive what is required. Either way the inner-motivation to succeed in keeping it clean or to avoid allowing it to get dirty is at play. Whether you have a desire or feel like doing, what you should do depend on your initial thought. Like thoughts attract and if you have thought of avoiding letting your car to get dirty, you are going to attract more. If you SEE that your car is dirty and receive instruction from your mind, you will most likely feel like avoiding the task. On the other hand, if you SEE that your car is getting dirty and have thought positive the instruction from your mind seems more like a hint.

By understanding how our inner-motivation functions, we can gain insight to the reason we feel forced. If we think of what we don’t want when it comes to what we want, we resist. However, when we think of what we want, a desire develops. Our wants and needs must align if we hope to develop a desire and have a true commitment. When you want your car to remain clean, and then SEE the need to wash it, these thoughts can align. This is the reason that the experts tell us to focus on the outcome, and visualize it in a positive light. The next time your common sense reveals what you have to do, and your inner-motivation engages, consider willingly, doing what you think should. The sooner you respond to what you think you should do, the better you will feel, about yourself. Moreover, with a willingness to do what you think you should, you are responding rather than reacting to yourself.


1 Comments to “Responding to Your Wants Rather Than Reacting”

  1. Dia says:

    Nice post Sandra! What I usually do is focus on what I want and don’t allow myself to resist and then things seem to go very well. Thanks for sharing

    .-= Dia´s last blog ..5 ways to get rid of painful memories =-.

  2. [...] This post was mentioned on Twitter by Sandra Hendricks, Sandra Hendricks. Sandra Hendricks said: "Give & Get » Responding to Your Wants Rather Than Reacting" – http://bit.ly/9zWkp0 via @thisshouldhelp2 [...]